17 February 2012

Inertia

No announcements here. Just something I worked up to amuse myself the last time I was hyperemetic. 

“Will you walk a little faster?” said the brain unto the feet,
“I can feel the stomach turning and the outcome won’t be neat.
Sense how nearabout our precious gastric system is divested
Of the paltry bit of breakfast we so wantonly ingested!
Will you, won’t you, will you, won’t you, will you join the dance?
Will you, won’t you, will you, won’t you, will you join the dance?

“You already have a notion how revolting it will be
If the mouth falls short of target and deposits all our scree
On the floor. Your lovely kingdom will be mucked all up with gluten!”
But the feet replied, “Too far!” and missed a beat in the cotillion—

Said they thanked the brain quite kindly, but they would not join the dance.
Would not, could not, would not, could not, would not join the dance.
Would not, could not, would not, could not, would not join the dance.

“You’ll be sorry,” warned the wiser part. “You know the score by now.
What does miss that rounded rim will be our problem anyhow.
The further from the bathroom, the nearer then to Couch—
You obdurate heel! Beat it! While you might yet stand a chance!
‘Cause there ain’t no way you’re gonna sit out this round of the dance.
Will you, won’t you, will you, won’t you, will you join the dance?
Will you, won’t you, will you, won’t you, will you join the dance?”

9 comments:

Leah said...

This is so well written, it's making me feel sick. :D

Cathy said...

If there's an award for taking one of the most pitiable of human conditions, and describing it in sheer poetry, this gets the Grand Prize! My youngest is now fourteen, so it's been a while since I've been there, but...(hear Bob Hope singing),"Thaaanks, for the memorieeees..." P.S. A quick riddle: Can the stomach say to the feet, I have no need of thee?

Mary P said...

Please - I've only been over my morning sickness for a few days now, but after reading this. Auggh. :-) But you ARE quite a writer!

greatgaunts said...

Thanks for the disclaimer there, lady. :)

Reb. Mary said...

groan :P

Cheryl said...

Ha--my husband's junior high choir learned a musical setting of the Lewis Carroll poem last year, which means I am not merely reading this but imagining it sung.

Gauntlets said...

:D

I'm going to have to learn the tune so I can hum it to myself next time around. Will make all of us feel much better, for sure.

Leah said...

I marvel at your ability to compose poetry while running to the bathroom. Usually the only thoughts I can muster up are grunts and moans.

Gauntlets said...

Running inspired, but couch composed. Also, I stole the skeleton, so all the hard work was done already. ;)