Reb. Mary asks me off-blog how the other kids are doing, and if she's alone in feeling guilty about screwing up the status quo for the ones we already know and love. I think it's a question we all wonder about.
A lot of times, the excuse people give for not having more kids is that it isn't fair to the other ones, that it amounts to depriving the kids they already have of things they'd have otherwise. I think "things" is the operative word there. A friend from a two-kid family explained to me how nice it was that she and her sister both got cars when they turned sixteen. A mom who admitted to wishing they could have afforded more kids said that their family size meant her son had music lessons and her daughter played on a club team. Don't think this doesn't appeal to me. One of the biggest temptations parents face is giving their kids everything. I'm sure a lot of people would have felt bad for our kids if they'd seen our tree on Christmas Eve. If we were done now (or had been done two babies ago, like any sane people would be), I wouldn't have to avert my eyes and mortify my flesh when the little spring clothes come out on the store racks, our daughter would have a real piano teacher, our son would have a real haircut, and (theoretically) I'd never tell them I'm too tired to read tonight.
But in the same way that it means more to me to have a baby than to have cute new brand name jeans and a reliably-sized body to put in them, it is better for our kids to have a house full of people who love each other than a house full of things to fill up the space and activities to fill up the time. What makes it trickier is that their dad and I have made that decision for them. All we can do is pray that they believe it too, and don't covet the empty life of stuff and diversions that can look so appealing to kids who wear hand-me-downs and go to grandma's for vacation (I speak from experience).
So we didn't read a bedtime story on Monday or Tuesday, and everybody's waiting longer for breakfast these days, and sometimes Mom inexplicably freaks out. Thanks be to God, they all love the baby. I'm pretty sure that if you gave them the choice today, they'd take him over another toy they'd just cry about having to pick up later on. May God in his mercy preserve them in that virtue. (And yes, we read and did piano and had globe time today! Go me! Tomorrow--no promises.)
31 January 2008
30 January 2008
What is a brother?
Inspired by Gauntlets' most recent post, and by the recent high levels of brotherly friction hereabouts, I'll share this poem by Mary Ann Hoberman:
Brother
I had a little brother
And brought him to my mother
And I said I want another
Little brother for a change.
But she said don't be a bother
So I took him to my father
And I said this little bother
Of a brother's very strange.
But he said one little brother
Is exactly like another
And every little brother
Misbehaves a bit he said.
So I took the little bother
From my mother and my father
And put the little bother
Of a brother back to bed.
Came across this in a book called Here's a Little Poem: A Very First Book of Poetry that my mom gave me and the boys for Christmas. Fun book; I really enjoyed it the first ten times through (hah!), and find that reading these poems over and over is not nearly as annoying as the repetition of certain other books...and we all know that's a huge point in any book's favor! The illustrations are what would probably be termed "whimsical," but in my opinion are firmly within the charming and well done art of that genre.
Anyone else have favorite first-poetry type books that will both "edify and delight" the preschool set? Always looking for a good one...hard to find one where the quality of the illustrations matches the quality of the writing (unless of course, the quality in question is poor, in which case the market is flooded.)
p.s. I'm sure, of course, that none of Rebekah's new boy's siblings will ever have cause to note that "brother" is just "bother" with another "r."
Brother
I had a little brother
And brought him to my mother
And I said I want another
Little brother for a change.
But she said don't be a bother
So I took him to my father
And I said this little bother
Of a brother's very strange.
But he said one little brother
Is exactly like another
And every little brother
Misbehaves a bit he said.
So I took the little bother
From my mother and my father
And put the little bother
Of a brother back to bed.
Came across this in a book called Here's a Little Poem: A Very First Book of Poetry that my mom gave me and the boys for Christmas. Fun book; I really enjoyed it the first ten times through (hah!), and find that reading these poems over and over is not nearly as annoying as the repetition of certain other books...and we all know that's a huge point in any book's favor! The illustrations are what would probably be termed "whimsical," but in my opinion are firmly within the charming and well done art of that genre.
Anyone else have favorite first-poetry type books that will both "edify and delight" the preschool set? Always looking for a good one...hard to find one where the quality of the illustrations matches the quality of the writing (unless of course, the quality in question is poor, in which case the market is flooded.)
p.s. I'm sure, of course, that none of Rebekah's new boy's siblings will ever have cause to note that "brother" is just "bother" with another "r."
29 January 2008
What Is a Boy?
I recently came upon this old newspaper clipping from my great-grandmother's memory box. I share it with you in honor of all the boys that have been and will be born amongst the CSPP and beyond. Click the image to enlarge and read.Long live men.
26 January 2008
I have gotten a man
and I'm feeling pretty darn good about it. Learned a few things along the way: your fourth baby can be your smallest (7 lb 11 oz, and the others were all over 8!), your fourth baby might do something none of your other babies did and make you freak out like a first timer (totally nasty puking? no biggie, say the nurses), and you might spend more time praying about L&D over the course of your pregnancy than you actually spend in L&D (about 70 minutes, formally--!!!). What a day. He's a fine lad and definitely worth the trouble. Thanks to all for your care and prayer.
25 January 2008
Something to do as we await the posting of official news
Take the Which Jane Austen Character are You? (For Females) Quiz and post your results.
My closest match was to Elizabeth Bennett, who as we all know is the heroine of what may very well be the best novel of all time, Austen's Pride and Prejudice. Woo-hoo!
Looks like that site has a gazillion quizzes, one of which is titled, "Which mythological creature are you?" I didn't take it, but I suspect that if Gauntlets' eldest took it, she might be a pegicorn? (Assuming that the quiz is advanced enough to list such a creature).
My closest match was to Elizabeth Bennett, who as we all know is the heroine of what may very well be the best novel of all time, Austen's Pride and Prejudice. Woo-hoo!
Looks like that site has a gazillion quizzes, one of which is titled, "Which mythological creature are you?" I didn't take it, but I suspect that if Gauntlets' eldest took it, she might be a pegicorn? (Assuming that the quiz is advanced enough to list such a creature).
24 January 2008
What to do when you find a healthy plant growing in your sink
1. Ignore it for at least another week.
2. Remember that people from church are going to be running the house all day tomorrow and since you're going to have to make sure the sink is empty for once, they might notice it.
3. Look around for help.
4. Notice cute little pot with thumbprint ladybugs on it which you received for Mother's Day from preschooler, and that the marigold which once grew in it is beyond mostly dead.
5. Pick dead marigold and throw it away (make sure you do this BEFORE summoning children).
6. Summon children and tell them we're doing a science lesson.
7. Carefully remove seedling from nutrient-rich growth medium in sink drain.
8. Note with children that it looks like this is a pumpkin seed. Note privately that the last time a pumpkin was in the house was November. Talk about how the seed split and a little plant with two special leaves is growing out of it. Get a spoon, dig a hole in the cute little pot of dirt, and plant the seedling. Put cute little pot back in the windowsill and tell the kids it's their job to remind you to water it.
9. Congratulate yourself for giving your children a better life than you had. You were in 7th grade before you ever heard the word "dicotyledon," for crying out loud.
10. Share this important information on your blog. Intend to post a photo, but remember that there are no batteries in the camera or anywhere in the house, which always happens right before you have a new baby.
2. Remember that people from church are going to be running the house all day tomorrow and since you're going to have to make sure the sink is empty for once, they might notice it.
3. Look around for help.
4. Notice cute little pot with thumbprint ladybugs on it which you received for Mother's Day from preschooler, and that the marigold which once grew in it is beyond mostly dead.
5. Pick dead marigold and throw it away (make sure you do this BEFORE summoning children).
6. Summon children and tell them we're doing a science lesson.
7. Carefully remove seedling from nutrient-rich growth medium in sink drain.
8. Note with children that it looks like this is a pumpkin seed. Note privately that the last time a pumpkin was in the house was November. Talk about how the seed split and a little plant with two special leaves is growing out of it. Get a spoon, dig a hole in the cute little pot of dirt, and plant the seedling. Put cute little pot back in the windowsill and tell the kids it's their job to remind you to water it.
9. Congratulate yourself for giving your children a better life than you had. You were in 7th grade before you ever heard the word "dicotyledon," for crying out loud.
10. Share this important information on your blog. Intend to post a photo, but remember that there are no batteries in the camera or anywhere in the house, which always happens right before you have a new baby.
22 January 2008
Casuistry: the ethics of tattling
Ok, so nobody likes a tattle-tale, but isn't that just because we don't like getting in trouble? Isn't the tattler actually in compliance with authorities and regulations? If Kid 1 reports that Kid 2 didn't do his fair share of picking up, does Kid 2 not get in trouble because I got the information through tattling? Is there some inherent fault with tattling such that the tattler should get in trouble for having tattled? Or, given that I want to know if someone is doing something they shouldn't, should tattling be encouraged? Do I just think this way because I've always been one of those goody-goody brown haired girls with glasses who sinfully deplores the courser sins of others and whose own transgressions are far more subtle, soul-destroying, and un-tattleable? Somebody help me out here. I just need to know who does and doesn't get a treat after lunch.
21 January 2008
Book, Recommended
EldestChild and I have been reading Mary Poppins, by P. L. Travers. Get it. Read it to the small ones. You won't be sorry. Each chapter has enough fantasy mixed with snooty nanny mixed with raspberry tarts to keep the children in make believe for hours.
And it's nothing, nothing, nothing like this.
And it's nothing, nothing, nothing like this.
First Annual CSPP Conference
The Concordian Sisters of Perpetual Parturition announce the first annual Conference of the same, to be held concurrently with the Concordia Catechetical Academy Symposium on Catechesis. Agenda items include:
--Chasing babies around
--Asking strangers to constrain escaping babies while Reb. Mary and Rebekah are stuck nursing
--Conducting recon on vehicles of families who have been at this longer than we have
--Thinking, "Do you think we'll end up with that many?"
--Telling the babies, "No one is swimming until Dad gets back. You think I'm getting in a swimming suit? Don't ask again."
--Letting the babies watch TV for once!!!!! Lying on the bed while they do it!
--Taking shameless advantage of Reb. Mary's gracious local connections
--Talking about how no one slept last night since one or more babies in each family can't sleep anywhere other than home
--Joyfully taking the babies to at least one church service where they can see an entire congregation behaving with proper liturgical decorum.
--Muttering about how the string section at said service is lovely but it sure blocks the exit when the baby starts screaming
--Hovering anxiously outside the door at the Kevin Voss presentation on contraception, straining to hear what's going on inside
--Eating LOTS of that potato salad at the Augsburger barbecue
--Having either not enough sunscreen or not enough sweatshirts at the Augsburger barbecue
Keynote address: Oldest Gauntlet baby on the topic of Pegacorns
Response: Mother of the Gauntlets about how we've all heard enough on this topic
And the big question: WILL THE GAUNTLETS BE PREGNANT AGAIN BY THEN?!?!
Registration not required. Look for us at a local playground or somewhere in the seething mass of women and children outside the main ballroom. We will be unwashed.
--Chasing babies around
--Asking strangers to constrain escaping babies while Reb. Mary and Rebekah are stuck nursing
--Conducting recon on vehicles of families who have been at this longer than we have
--Thinking, "Do you think we'll end up with that many?"
--Telling the babies, "No one is swimming until Dad gets back. You think I'm getting in a swimming suit? Don't ask again."
--Letting the babies watch TV for once!!!!! Lying on the bed while they do it!
--Taking shameless advantage of Reb. Mary's gracious local connections
--Talking about how no one slept last night since one or more babies in each family can't sleep anywhere other than home
--Joyfully taking the babies to at least one church service where they can see an entire congregation behaving with proper liturgical decorum.
--Muttering about how the string section at said service is lovely but it sure blocks the exit when the baby starts screaming
--Hovering anxiously outside the door at the Kevin Voss presentation on contraception, straining to hear what's going on inside
--Eating LOTS of that potato salad at the Augsburger barbecue
--Having either not enough sunscreen or not enough sweatshirts at the Augsburger barbecue
Keynote address: Oldest Gauntlet baby on the topic of Pegacorns
Response: Mother of the Gauntlets about how we've all heard enough on this topic
And the big question: WILL THE GAUNTLETS BE PREGNANT AGAIN BY THEN?!?!
Registration not required. Look for us at a local playground or somewhere in the seething mass of women and children outside the main ballroom. We will be unwashed.
19 January 2008
Papa knows worst
So our culture's hostility toward traditional manhood/fatherhood is no secret. We've come to expect that the father-figure in popular sitcoms, movies, etc., will be at best a good-hearted fool, at worst a bumbling idiot, absent, or even malevolent.
But it's always more disturbing to see the man-bashing in children's media. A collection of Berenstain Bears stories recently arrived in our mailbox, a late Christmas present from a well-meaning relative. When the boys opened it, I thought, "Cute. Harmless sort of kids' classic. Looks like lots of them have nice little "morals" about sharing, first trip to the dentist, etc."
Then we read some of the stories. I found myself editing almost every page as I went along (one of the few benefits of having kids who can't read for themselves yet, I suppose).
First, there's the annoyance factor--that there's Mama Bear, Papa Bear, and their two little cubs, Brother Bear and Sister Bear.
But worse is the portrayal of Papa Bear. For instance, in "The Berenstain Bears Forget Their Manners," Mama Bear is trying to civilize her cubs (a worthy pursuit in which we wish her better luck than we ourselves are currently having). As the story begins, Mama Bear "tried going to Papa for help (though it sometimes seemed to Mama that he was part of the problem)."
As I read this, I thought at first it was one of those little inside jokes that children's authors sometimes insert, knowing that the adult reading the story aloud may have a little chuckle, though the kids won't really get it. But as the story unfolds, the truth is more sinister: Papa Bear is shown to be a boorish buffoon who doesn't even realize when he's being hypocritical. I definitely stopped chuckling.
Then in "The Berenstain Bears Get the Gimmies," Papa undermines Mama's every attempt at proper discipline, until the cubs get so unruly that they embarrass him publicly. Then he explodes at them with ineffectual rage, which he follows up with a cliched and equally ineffective lecture. Fortunately, good ol' Gramps and Gran appear on the scene in the nick of time, and a plan is finally worked out.
It's been years since I encountered anything in the BB series aside from the stories in this collection--so if there is anything worthwhile in the series, by all means let me know. But rest assured, this particular volume has been removed from our family library.
But it's always more disturbing to see the man-bashing in children's media. A collection of Berenstain Bears stories recently arrived in our mailbox, a late Christmas present from a well-meaning relative. When the boys opened it, I thought, "Cute. Harmless sort of kids' classic. Looks like lots of them have nice little "morals" about sharing, first trip to the dentist, etc."
Then we read some of the stories. I found myself editing almost every page as I went along (one of the few benefits of having kids who can't read for themselves yet, I suppose).
First, there's the annoyance factor--that there's Mama Bear, Papa Bear, and their two little cubs, Brother Bear and Sister Bear.
But worse is the portrayal of Papa Bear. For instance, in "The Berenstain Bears Forget Their Manners," Mama Bear is trying to civilize her cubs (a worthy pursuit in which we wish her better luck than we ourselves are currently having). As the story begins, Mama Bear "tried going to Papa for help (though it sometimes seemed to Mama that he was part of the problem)."
As I read this, I thought at first it was one of those little inside jokes that children's authors sometimes insert, knowing that the adult reading the story aloud may have a little chuckle, though the kids won't really get it. But as the story unfolds, the truth is more sinister: Papa Bear is shown to be a boorish buffoon who doesn't even realize when he's being hypocritical. I definitely stopped chuckling.
Then in "The Berenstain Bears Get the Gimmies," Papa undermines Mama's every attempt at proper discipline, until the cubs get so unruly that they embarrass him publicly. Then he explodes at them with ineffectual rage, which he follows up with a cliched and equally ineffective lecture. Fortunately, good ol' Gramps and Gran appear on the scene in the nick of time, and a plan is finally worked out.
It's been years since I encountered anything in the BB series aside from the stories in this collection--so if there is anything worthwhile in the series, by all means let me know. But rest assured, this particular volume has been removed from our family library.
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