1. Medical/societal: 6 weeks. Once the doctor signs off on you, people expect business as usual.
2. Emotional: varies. Probably between 3 months and 2 years.
3. Gravitational: as long as weight is going down. Let's call this 9-12 months like the professionals recommend, although public opinion considers 2-3 weeks more than generous.
4. Pileous: as long as hair is falling out. My shower drain indicates this is still going strong at 7 months, and may be related to the gravitational indicator.
5. Somnial: at whatever point the mother begins having enough sleep regularly to feel regular. Varies widely.
6. Somatic: whenever functions approximate normal/painless. I said approximate.
7. Dermal: when stretch marks fade from shades of Lent.
8. Hygienic: when mother resumes bathing at a typical cultural rate.
9. Cinematic: when mother no longer falls asleep while trying to watch a movie with father.
10. Gestational: when mother becomes pregnant again.
8 comments:
So, the weight from baby #1 that was still there when baby #2 was born...can I now attribute that weight to baby #2 and gain some time?
Bonnie
very funny. I'm still trying to classify myslef as postpartum, but the girls will be 7 months soon, and my blad spot is filling in...and I've stopped losing weight...sooooo:)
Since I'm 40, I've decided not to care about #3 anymore.
Rebekah, I saw Pr Weedon's post about dinner w/you folks & thought, "Ah, my two favorite people whom I've never met!" :) You help me be a much better mommy - thanks.
Bonnie
typographical: when mother can type, more often than not, with two hands.
lacrimal (specification of #2): when mother can go several days without crying. very much.
DP, if you're out I am, so let's not have any more of that talk.
Bonnie, I'm confident you could rummage up some folk who would assure you we're not all that great. ;)
E&K, excellent points.
I just really really hate that anyone ever said anything about 6 weeks.
My vote is for #10. So there.
Ha! So even though my youngest is 2.5 years old, I can still classify as cinematically postpartum? I can barely get through a half-hour sitcom after the kids go to bed at 8:30. :-P
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