12 August 2009

Homeschooling 201

Now that we have the basics in hand, we can move through some more advanced material.

The skies are falling this month, most observably tonight. So, hand your oldest child a printout containing pertinent details about this particular falling sky, and bribe her to read it to her siblings. Read a summary of the more interesting angle over your lunch hour, and look excited when you announce that the family gets to take a field trip out to Country Church to watch the shower.

Then, make Quiet Hour into Quiet Two Hours; the little loves need more nap if they're going to be up late having fun. Plan a paper plate supper. Take a long walk downtown to buy $1 notepads--for journaling observations, of course--and a couple gallons of bug spray. Keep everyone from fighting with ease: "If you say that to your sister one more time, I'm leaving you home. Get it?"

Load up the van around 8:30P and drive 20 miles to your light-pollutionless location. Let the urchins run amok as the sun sets. Spread blankets, and "encourage them" to lie down for the big show. They will be tired. They will fall asleep.

You will be alone in the quiet in the dark under the stars with your husband for as long as you like.*

The end.

*Not counting the baby, who will likely still be awake and wallering. Beggars can't be choosers.


Rebekah said...

You are a genius.

Gauntlets said...

update: Everyone did indeed fall asleep in a big pile on the dirty dirt and it was great. We didn't see that many meteors, though. Lightning pollution.

Reb. Mary said...