29 February 2008

Feeling outnumbered

Boy1 [appearing around the corner with the pieces of something in his hand]: "I am a boy, and I break things."

Dad [trying to hide amusement]: "Oh really? Is that what it means to be a boy?"

Boy1: "Yes. I am a boy. Everything around here, I break."

Boy2 [pounding his tray gleefully]: "Break! Ha ha! Break! Ha ha!"

Boy3: Kick, kick, thump. Simultaneous shots to my ribs and kidneys.

Me to Dad [going into desperate lecture mode]: "You know, if you insist on producing only male children, that's fine. But I'm going to insist that they be civilized. Gentlemen. I will not have a house full of hooligans. And I get to define hooliganism."

Dad: "All right. I get to define full."

Me: "Fine. Hey, wait a minute..."

One little, two little, three little hooligans...


Rebekah said...

Our local 3-yr-old cites boyness as an excuse for all manner of offenses. Of course he can't put the books back on the shelf right side up, stack the papers neatly, find matching socks--"That's just the way boys are!"

Gauntlets said...

This entry, it makes my day. Especially the bit about BabyBoy giving adding his opinion to the mix.

Getting started early is what boys do! :)