31 December 2008

As the ball drops

Your New Year’s Eve looking a bit blah? Here’s the excitement you’ve been longing for: Make New Year’s resolutions—for each other. Ladies, take this opportunity to get a head start on your husband. Grab a crayon and some of those construction paper scraps off the floor and start your list.

Instant Fireworks! Wow! Zow! Bang! Yow!

After all, don’t you know your husband better than he knows himself? Sure, he’s a great provider, a real looker, and involved with the kids, but who knows better than you how he needs to be nagged about all those really important character issues, like the socks that never seem to make it into the hamper?

For best results, be sure to ambush, er, greet him at the door with your list of ill-considered demands, er, helpful suggestions.

Happy New Year to all, and to all a good night!

*NB: The author is not liable for the cost of marriage counseling or household damage that may result from taking this advice seriously. But if you do try this, by all means come back and leave a comment to tell us how it went :D


Rebekah said...

I think men are hard-wired to like chicks and leave socks on the floor. They just can't help it.

I'm sure his list for me would be things like: stop working so hard, stop sacrificing so much, take time for you, etc. My selflessness must be very hard to live with.

Anonymous said...

Suggestions for your husbands:
Buy more guns...for your wife.
...and yourself.
...and your kids.

Gauntlets said...

Here's my Be It resolved: The Husband will stop with all the nice so as to make The Wife look less like A Jerk. :D

Hey Anon: lose the nose/mustache and you look a lot like someone I know . . .

Reb. Mary said...


Gauntlets, lot of that going round here too :P

MooreMama said...

Hey, Gauntlets, are you sure that wasn't Mr Moore sneaking on here to comment?

probably not, but that's a pretty popular sentiment 'round these parts. :)

Melanie said...

Here I was thinking it was my husband...and I thought I was the only one with a husband with a sudden urge to hoard guns...